I usually don’t write such personal things like this on my social media sites, because, for the most part, I like to keep my feelings private, but I just felt I had to write this and tell everyone why I’m really doing all of this and working so hard just to get the right picture.
I don’t claim to be a professional photographer, or expect to be one at any point in my life, really. I just take pictures, because out of every other thing I’ve done in my life, this was the one craft I’ve loved from the time I was little (for people who know me, dance wasn’t my first love shockingly enough). I always miss important moments in my life, because the one habit that I got from my mom (it can be good and bad) is that I look so far ahead that I miss everything that is happening in the present. Taking these pictures and looking at them reminds me of what happened at that time, whether or not I actually want to sometimes.
This was the one craft I knew I didn’t have any raw talent in, I just loved taking pictures of anything, whether it be on my moms 2003 flip phone or my parents’ 1990s’ film camera, I just being behind the camera, not in front of it. For everyone who doesn’t know me, I can be pretty hard on myself. It comes from how I was raised. My parents made sure I didn’t have the “Only child syndrome.” Yes, I have an independent personality, but other than that, everything I do is usually for my friends and family, never really for me. I don’t like to boast myself, because I feel it makes me look absolutely stupid. I also don’t look for any re-assurance of my abilities nor do I want any, because I just feel embarrassed. In a nutshell, as annoying as it is, I can just be very self-deprecating and sometimes my friends can get annoyed by that fact.
Even now, I still think I’m sub-par compared to the many photographers I follow on wordpress, flickr, facebook, instagram, and other social media sites, but that’s okay because it just makes me work harder and keeps me from being too relaxed. With the many abilities I’ve been blessed with, I think this one is the one that I have to work the hardest at, and I’m okay with that.
Anyway, here is a photo that I took today during a sunset in Annapolis. I didn’t do any sort of editing on it yet. I wanted to post it because its pure moments like these that I never want to forget.